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Death Of A Spouse

For the past 179 days since my husband Chip passed away, I have been the fortunate recipient of numerous calls, texts, drive-by coffee and wine deliveries, and more hugs than anyone has a right to receive.  Still, the sting of living without Chip overrides my ability to heal…for now.

Great friends have offered words of wisdom and sent cards speaking of healing and finding peace, but the one that got to me was from my friend Lynda W. in Manhattan. Lynda knew me before I was Karen Lombardo. She screened Chip fully as a suitable husband and partner. Chip loved her and her sister Toby so I thought it would be fitting to impart her poignant words upon you all for a smile and some joy

Put some “Chips” back into your life.

Here is the uncut, unedited email text from Lynda.

So, I have been thinking about some ideas to help you through this roller coaster period of your life. I am not nearly as creative as you in writing but here it goes.

Since you have become “Chipless” I thought it might be helpful to put some “chips” back in your life. The BIG CHIP is in your small box (the urn) but how about putting together a “Chip List” and try adding a “chip” to your day.

My suggestions for you to consider:

  • Chocolate chip
  • Wood chip
  • Microchip
  • Chipotle
  • Chipper
  • Chips ( as in British French fries)
  • Potato chips
  • Taco chips
  • Vegetable chips
  • Chip in
  • Chipmunk
  • Chip off the old block
  • Memory chip

The BIG CHIP is not only in your box, I know he is in your heart and soul. Maybe adding these chips will help you through some days ahead.
I’m hoping 2022 is kinder to you and your family than 2021 was, Karen.
mourning the death of a spouse


 Chip was not always a fan of being called Chip

When I first met Chip, he was introduced to me as Tony. The first weekend I went home with him to Syracuse, everyone called him Chip. I thought it was adorable, and  I defaulted to calling him Chip from that point forward.

He was not so fond of the nickname and told me he was made fun of all the time and called:

  • cow chip
  • potato chip
  • big lip chip
  • chip off the old block, which was true, he is a junior, Anthony J Lombardo, Jr.

He will forever be Chip to me. When I say his name, I think of times that I was scared or needed him and called “Chip!”. (If he was in trouble, it was always Anthony.)

Find comfort and don’t feel guilty or afraid to laugh

Sometimes I feel guilty laughing or having fun. I want Chip to be here and never be forgotten. Thank you, Lynda, for not forgetting him. You gave me solace and permission to smile.  I will follow your direction and lead and add chocolate chips to my morning protein shake. I bought a bag of dried apple chips for an afternoon snack. I am building back a chip-full life.

(But please don’t tell me I was the dip to his chip! 😊)

This Post Has 8 Comments

  1. That brought me to tears. All I can say is your journey will be full of all the chips you can handle and the real Chip will be smiling at his amazing partner. Hugs to you Karen…❤️❤️❤️

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